enigma_13_31
Feb 14, 2012 - 08:49:50 AM

:::::Good judgment comes from experience, and experience comes from bad judgment.?Barry LePatner:::::: :::::Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm. ?Winston Churchill::::::

enigma_13_31
Dec 29, 2011 - 03:09:42 PM

A CARROT,EGG& COFFEE:A woman went to her mother& told her about her life& how things were so hard for her;She was tired of fighting& struggling.Seemed as one problem was solved, a new one arose.Her mother took her to the kitchen.She filled three pots with water& placed each on a high fire.Soon the pots came to boil: she placed carrots in first, in the second eggs,& in the last ground coffee beans. She let them sit& boil, without saying a word 4 twenty minutes.She turned off the burner: fished the carrots, eggs and ladled the coffee out-placing each in their own bowl.She asked her daughter, "Tell me, what you see?" "Carrots, Eggs,& Coffee," Her mother brought her closer& asked her to feel the carrots.She did& noted that they were soft. The mother then asked the daughter to take an egg& break it. After pulling off the shell, she observed the hardboiled egg. Finally,the mother asked the daughter to sip the coffee. The daughter smiled as she tasted its rich aroma.The daughter then asked, "What does it mean, mother?"Her mother explained that each of these objects had faced the same Adversity= boiling water.Each reacted differently.The carrot went in strong, hard& unrelenting.However, after being subjected to the boiling water, it softened & became weak. The egg had been fragile.Its thin outer shell had protected its liquid interior,but after sitting through the boiling water,its inside became hardened. The ground coffee beans were unique,however.After they were in the boiling water, they had changed the water."Which are you?" she asked her daughter?."When adversity knocks on your door, how do you respond? Are you a carrot, an egg or a coffee bean?"

enigma_13_31
Nov 29, 2011 - 10:30:49 PM

For the twelfth bug of Christmas, my manager said to me 12- Tell them it's a feature -11- Say it's not supported -10- Change the documentation -9- Blame it on the hardware-8- Find a way around it -7- Say they need an upgrade -6- Reinstall the software -5- Ask for a dump -4- Run with the debugger -3- Try to reproduce it -2- Ask them how they did it -1-AND See if they can do it again!! ****SEAONS GREETINGS AND PERVINGS!****

enigma_13_31
Nov 29, 2011 - 10:03:02 PM

There was a man who worked all of his life& saved his money.He was a real miser.He loved money more than anything.Before he died, he said to his wife,'When I die,I want you to take all my money& place it in the casket with me;I'm taking it to the afterlife' So he got his wife to promise him she would put all the money in the casket with him.One day he died.He was stretched out in the casket;the wife was sitting there in black with her closest friend.When they finished the ceremony,just before they closed the casket,the wife said'Wait just a minute!'She had a shoe box& went over & placed it in the casket.The undertakers locked the casket down& rolled it away.Her friend said'I hope you weren't crazy enough to put that money in the casket' She said'I promised.I'm a good Christian& promised him I was going to put the money in the casket with him.''You mean to tell me you put every cent of his money in the casket with him?' 'I sure did,?said the wife.'I got it all together,put it into My Account & wrote him a Check.